Two men kidnapped a woman at a Bastrop Whataburger this morning. Mayor Wynn apologizes to city after assault charge, says he is in anger counseling. Winter weather leads to more than 200 flights being cancelled at DFW. On election day, APD arrested two members of the Mexican Mafia. With 41% of Texas precincts reporting, Obama is in the lead for caucus delegates. An agreement set up today between the City of Austin and TxDOT means that your vehicle registration could be denied if you don't pay your traffic fines. After losing the race for Tax Assessor-Collector, Maxey endorses Nelda Wells-Spears and says he is going to help the Obama campaign....

So, I produce and co-star a little show called The Dick Monologues. We have four shows this month—three more than usual. Two are in Dallas this weekend at the Water Tower Theatre as part of the Out of the Loop Festival. Two are here in town—one at the Victory Grill on March 21st and the other at Hyde Park Theatre on March 30th. Please tell your Dallas friends to come to the show up there. And if you want to attend an Austin show, please email me at spike@spikeg.com for info. This week, I present a piece I wrote that sometimes appears in the show. Big Dick on Buddha Mountain To meditate with the enlightened Buddhist monk, Thich Nhat Hanh, is akin to playing guitar with Pete Townsend, making cookies with Martha Stewart, or tying your shoes with Mister Rogers. And so, despite my tight budget, when I heard that Thay, as he is known, was leading a retreat in California, I did what any overzealous aspiring Buddhist would do: I mailed off a hot check to procure my place at the monastery. ...

The Democratic party of Williamson County didn't order enough ballots; some precincts had used half of their ballots before the afternoon and evening rush. Today is the day of judgment for some of Craddick's Democratic supporters. Austin's Pluck purchased by Demand Media. Alfonso Royal, aide to Gov. Perry, named as chief of staff for TYC. The man who tried to steal copper from an East Austin electrical substation last week has died. ...

Clinton campaign seeks to control local caucus sessions? According to a Dallas Morning News blog, recent training materials distributed by the Clinton campaign read, "DO NOT allow the supporter of another candidate to serve in leadership roles... If our supporters are outnumbered, ask the Temporary Chair if one of our supporters can serves as the Secretary, in the interest of fairness." Mike Huckabee's latest outreach video reworks "Mr Sandman" Calling "Rangers," Huckabee's supporters are urged......

Reason the power was out in East Austin Wednesday afternoon: a copper theft gone seriously wrong. The Cowboy Breakfast this morning kicked off the rodeo in town by providing a free breakfast to everyone there at 6am. Slightly reminiscent of "Daisy": Obama campaign unhappy with Hillary's new "Children" campaign ad. Clinton attends funeral of Dallas cop who died while serving in her motorcade. Huckabee makes campaign stop in Waco today. Show your voter registration card and ride the bus for free on election day....

"We're not publishing the list in our news columns, period": Statesman Editor Oppel on why the paper will not include a listing of precinct voting locations on election day. McCain stopped in San Antonio today. Bill Clinton spoke in town today. On the primary race between Glen Maxey and incumbent Nelda Wells Spears. Power outage in East Austin this afternoon. While her father was tied up, a robber sexually-assaulted a 15-year-old girl in a South Austin apartment yesterday morning. Semi veers off Dallas highway ramp and falls onto Continental Avenue; at least 3 are dead. ...

After Van Halen, Bruce Springsteen, Radiohead, and Jay-Z all elected to skip Austin on their spring US tours, it's not unreasonable to feel that our music-loving town seems to be off the radar of the arena pop and rock circuit. This despite a perfectly functional (if rather dated) basketball arena smack in the center in town. Thankfully, the Louis Vuitton Don Kanye West agrees with you, and has elected to show Austin some big-production love with a date here at The Frank Erwin Center in late April....

If you were there to see the many downright amazing clips featured in “You’re Looking at Country,” a Music Mondays presentation at the Drafthouse a few weeks ago hosted by Dallas Wayne, among live performances by Faron Young, Willie Nelson, Loretta Lynn and more was The Man in Black himself, Johnny Cash, pickin’ his big hit “Get Rhythm.” ...

Red light camera locations announced this afternoon. New TYC conservator rules out the use of pepper spray in youth prisons, except for in emergency cases. Dallas cop serving in Hillary's motorcade this morning killed after his bike hit a retaining wall. Little Walnut Creek library location is opening tomorrow after almost a year of renovation....

A season ticket for the Longhorns' seven home football games this year will cost you $385, according to the Statesman's Bevo Beat blog....

Texas Huckabee supporters aren't giving up. Early voting starts tomorrow and goes through Feb. 29. Two Austin High teens die over the weekend after the car they are in is hit by a hydroplaning truck. USDA finally recalls beef already sent to Central Texas schools....

The first segment of Radiohead's North American tour has been announced, and Austin gets the shaft: Houston's Cynthia Woods Mitchell Pavilion will get a show on May 17, and Dallas' Superpages.com Center (!) will host the Brits on May 18. Tickets go on sale Thursday (Valentine's day) via W.A.S.T.E. with general on-sales following on February 16. ...

This week’s installment of Music Mondays at the Alamo Drafthouse at the Ritz is all country, all the way. You’re Looking at Country, a film that shares the name of a Loretta Lynn song, is a look back on that golden age of country and western music when George Jones, Johnny Cash, and their ilk ruled the airwaves and parlayed their fame into television spots and even shows. Dolly Parton, one of SXSW’s most anticipated performers, also makes appearances in the film, as does Lynn and many, many more....

Adrian Jaimes found safe last night in North Austin; police are still searching for his kidnappers. Whole Foods: "more interested in cheap tomatoes than the well-being of those working to get produce to the store." Parents from NYOS charter school met with school officials this morning to discuss death of student last week; memorial service for Tevin Park-Flowers tomorrow. Convicted rapist escapes South Texas prison by leaving through an unlocked door. Women targeting businessmen at fancy Dallas hotels, slipping them the Mickey Finn to steal their watches....

Police on the lookout for Adrian Jaimes and his three abductors; his older sister recognized one of the abductors as someone who had harassed her and her brother in January on their way home from school. Sorry, Texas GOP Primary voters planning to vote for Romney! He's dropped out so that his campaign won't help the terrorists win. Or something like that. A lot of Texas GOP voters not happy about having to vote for McCain....

15% of items put out for recycling in Austin end up in a landfill anyway. Dewhurst doubts TxDOT's claims of being really low on funds. Speaking of TxDOT, you can vote on their site for the next state license plate design. Voting ends next Monday. Illegal immigrants moving to Texas in large numbers from . . . Oklahoma and Arizona?...

The high winds aren't helping the firefighters working on the grass fires in Burnet, Williamson and Hays counties. People involved in ACL fire are suing the makers of the RV and the manufacturers of the parts on the propane tank. Complaint filed with Texas Ethics Commission against Dawnna Dukes for her incomplete reporting of $90,000 worth of campaign credit card charges....

City Council is considering a proposal that would revise the zoning regulations on East 12th Street along the lines of the recent revisions to the zoning regulations on East 11th Street (item 44 on the agenda). The new regulations would apply between I-35 an Poquito St. and would generally allow for mid-rise construction along 12th Street. ...

Navdo is a record label that also promotes and books artists, and this Thursday they’re hosting their first “Hangin’ with Navdo” in Austin at The Parish, featuring Peel, The Boxing Lesson, and AM Syndicate. AM Syndicate will be celebrating the release of their second album, Liberation, recorded by Erik Wofford at Cacophony Records. This will be the first release put out by fledgling label Novastar Records....

Vandals are smashing SUV rear windows around town and not stealing anything. Austin Energy's fuel charge goes up in January. Trinity U. school officials discover multiple firearms in a student's dorm room after the student checks out for winter break. ...

This weekend brings another tremendous set of gigs to our beloved city. If the abundance of synth-pop and electro-rock acts lately is bringing you down, raise your spirits and beers to some stellar rock n’ roll on Friday. Emo’s hosts one of Austin’s hardest rockers in the form of the Young Heart Attack, while the newly renovated Austin Music Hall boasts a Dallas - Forth Worth Metroplex attack in the shape of the Toadies and Baboon....

Former Dallas resident Nancy Rose McGowan, 26, was thrown in Travis County Jail yesterday after authorities discovered that she lacked a state board license and, more disconcertingly, any kind of formal education in pharmacy work whatsoever. McGowan had been working at the CVS Pharmacy at 4405 E. Riverside Drive for the past two months, and actively filled prescriptions using the names "Amber Mclendon" and "Amber Shcherbelis."...

Image from MySpace Ready Steady GoFriday, December 7Rio Rita Cafe y Cantina (1308 E 6th St)Free, 9pm-2am[info] This Friday, get ready to get retro. Ready Steady Go is coming to Rio Rita, and East Sixth Street is about to get walloped with the sort of danceable goodness that only five, yes five DJs can produce. Moving from their residency at Beerland, Ready Steady Go collaborators Mike Hooker and Shorty Stump will be spinning their vinyl......

Photo by Pat Rioux on flickr Wanna see the Cowboys game tonight and don't know anyone with the NFL network? Local sports bars are getting ready for what could be their busiest night this year. Former Chester's site to house a community-service-oriented Christian congregation. Currently only one in five 5th graders who fail the TAKS are made to repeat the grade. Father of UT student killed in 1996 accident doesn't think the driver needs to......

Photo by Lorrie McClanahan on flickrWarning to today's travelers: if you are flying to DFW today, or stopping there on your way somewhere else, get ready to wait. A software issue this morning blocked communications to the East and West Towers at DFW for about twenty minutes. To deal with that, air traffic controllers increased the space between flights. As a result, your wait to fly out from or land at DFW could be long;......

Photo from KEYEWhen Clarence Swenson was twenty-two, he joined over 100 little people to play a Munchkin in The Wizard of Oz. Later this month, he (along with the other Oz Munchkins) will be awarded a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. He is one of the nine Munchkins still alive today; seven of the other surviving Munchkins will also attend the ceremony. Swenson appeared in the classic film as a Munchkin soldier. He......

Image from Myspace Matthew Zapruder and Jeff TietzFriday, November 9Follett's Intellectual Property (2402 Guadalupe)Free, 5:30pm[info]Matthew Zapruder’s new collection of poetry is called The Pajamaist. We’re still not sure if this one of those cosmic coincidences, or if Zapruder meant to sing the lyrical praises of all things “IST.” In any case, the collection is excellent, as is his previous work, and we will be out in our most stylish PJs to watch him read at......

Chemical spill closed highway in Williamson County for a good part of the day today. Perry defends the expensive rent for his Barton Creek-area temporary home, saying, "Texas ain't Arkansas." Man arrested at the border for a murder committed 13 years ago in Northeast Austin. Shocker: Secretary of State expects low voter turnout for this constitutional amendment election. Supposed chupacabra discovered in Cuero found to be just a coyote. "Get out of Iraq .......

Former Westlake High teacher resigns to teach at a lower-income school; less than pleased, Eanes school district attempts to get him suspended A UT journalism student has a nice chat with Dan Rather during a morning Jet Blue flight from Austin to New York City A routine traffic stop in Hunt County turns up two dozen embalmed human heads in the back of a tractor-trailer A woman in the Dallas/Fort Worth area comes forward with......

Round Rock ISD announces another case of MRSA. Wash your hands, y'all! (see video at right) Woman attacked and sexually assaulted by man and two women in her South Austin apartment earlier this week; Police think she was specifically targeted, but didn't know her attackers. Laura Hall won't get a new trial, but her family isn't giving up. Southwest Key moves to their new facility. Local Ron Paul supporters ask Leslie to participate in......